I'm Supposedly Fine
by SushiWTF
Summary: Who says that love is all rainbow and sushine?


Love, of course, is a natural stage…or part of life. It's meant to bring sunshine and good vibes, but after the sun goes down, the monsters wait for you on the other side. The call out to you waiting for you to step on their stairs, they lure you in and whisper sweet nothings. They say time heals and that there's always sun after rain, but for Mia, there was no sun…just darkness.

Mia always thought about it this way, she thought it was cringy and just a bunch of bullshit. Sun after rain? Time heals? Good vibes? Where? Mia made mistakes and had many regrets like sending nudes to someone online and not worry about the dangers, like smoking on the rooftop with her best friend, not giving a fuck about the city below. It was always this way, letting things slide and not worrying about it. She didn't care at this point and it was ok, she was still young and had plenty of time to contemplate her shitty life choices. But she had dreams she wanted to accomplish, sights she wanted to travel to, food she wanted to eat…although he left, she was fine, albeit lonely, but fine.

As she sat on the rooftop with her best friend, Nora, she looked at the stars wondering where it all went wrong, where she fucked up…again. He was perfect, had a nice body that was so perfectly sculpted, but not like a bunch a rock just sitting there. Athletic, he was of course good at everything. He had perfect skin; it glowed and was too soft for a boy. Maybe he secretly used night creams or something, but it doesn't matter anymore. He was tall. Stereotyped, I know, but who doesn't like a man who'll dominate you. He was delicate and treated you like a princess or maybe more like a queen. He knew the limits and boundaries without you setting them. He just knew and it was always a mystery to her. And he had this one of a kind personality, he never got mad easily, or maybe he did, but never shows it to anyone. He was shy, but when no one's looking, his…other side comes out. The bolder, hornier type. He keeps everything to myself and always takes care of everyone else before himself. It was a trait that she always admired. I haven't said the boys' name yet, but I'm sure somewhere in your head, you thought of that person. Boy or girl, it doesn't matter as long as you love them. But in my case, his name was Elijah.

It all started when we moved overseas. Parents never ask you what you want, sometimes you just deal with it and have all this pent up aggression later or you just get all depressed. There wasn't a warning, just imagine your parents barging into your room telling you to pack up your shit and say your goodbyes. Imagine selling your pets because you didn't want to risk them getting them sick by shipping them overseas. Imagine getting pulled out of middle school after being enrolled for two days. Imagine just letting go of this rope just to please your parents. Mia never understood why it was so important to just suddenly move, her parents had an average income, and we had what we could call a home, moving here was just a mistake. But in life, you win some and you lose some. I guess I could see why moving was important now, the USA was fucking itself over and my parents didn't want to get fucked over with it.

Moving halfway across the globe is an experience, it's a journey, and it's a new life. New food, new people, new language, new scenery…a new story. Taiwan is a small island east of China, surround by the East & South China Sea and the Philippine Sea. Mountains right next to the ocean, a beautiful sight really. It was hot in the summer, cold in the winter, rained hard not a lot of sunshine, kinda the standard weather. But…everyone here spoke Chinese or Taiwanese. English? It's spoken here yes, but only to those dedicated in school. I had to start from the basics and work my way up from the bottom. I was enrolled into 7th grade when I was 12. I learned the basics and worked my way up slowly. I was writing, typing, listening, speaking it, though not fluently yet. I had these foreign classmates that I would be with for the next 3 years. I never saw him as something more until we hit 8th grade. I just had this sudden interest and it was nagging at me for months. I tried getting closer and all I ever saw was him. Him this, him that. I had crushes in the past while I was here, but nothing was as reachable. It was a chance I was willing to take.

"You know, Peggy, I have a crush on Elijah", I casually mentioned. Peggy, one of Mia's best friend, spit out her water, spraying Mia in the process. Peggy was a literal angel, but had an inner bitch if you got on her bad side. Short, skinny, tan, cute…Anime trash, was into my crushes best friend, had sass, she was one of my best friends. I yelled out before taking all of her tissues to clean her mess. My other friend Anna had no reaction whatsoever.

"To be honest, I already knew, but if saying it out loud makes you feel better then be my guest." Anna rolled her eyes before walking out of the classroom to mostly likely meet with her other friends. Anna also had attitude, was talented as fuck, athletic, taller than me, tanner than me, better than me…but she was also one of my best friends. She looked out for me when I wasn't looking and stood up for me when I couldn't stand up for myself.

"You know, you wouldn't be his first girlfriend, the girl in the classroom behind ours, dated him. She said he was nice, but a little bland for her taste." I scrunched up my nose in response, there was nothing bland about a boy like him. "Her loss, but whatever. I still want him. I mean look at him, he's the epitome of sinful." He effortlessly sat there at his seat watching probably his billionth anime of the month. His hair falls carefully over his forehead into his eyes occasionally moving his head to the side to swipe it out of the way. It wasn't the first I stared at him and it will never be the last.

"Aye, aye yo Mia! Mia…M I A! EaRTh tO fUckIng MIA" Peggy was basically screaming into my ear at this point, capturing the attention of other classmates.

"What?" I was genuinely clueless.

"I literally can't, that was the 7th time today that I've done that and it's only been a few hours since school started…" Peggy turned away before taking her phone out to probably watch more anime. I sighed, I just couldn't help myself. I took out my new crisp journal and a pen. Maybe it was creepy, but I guess writing a love story about our fake love that'll never happen makes me feel better. I would never have a chance with him, but I could only dream. For all I knew, he probably already knew. He turned around in his seat to his school bag and grabbed a pair of headphones out. He picked his head up and his eyes somehow caught mine. He didn't break the eye contact and just kept staring and my heart pacing started picking up. I closed my notebook a little too forcefully before walking out of the classroom as well, his eyes still on me. I walked into the nurse's office and lied onto one of the beds, shoving the pillow in my face to scream aloud. The nurse walked up to me to smack me with her clipboard.

"Please leave, I hate when you come here every day," she said playfully. I knew she loved me secretly, but never wanted to admit it.

"I think I might have a nosebleed…"

"From him? You better not get that blood on my pillows. They're cheap, but I don't want to take care of your mistakes."

"How…how did you know that it was because of him?" I raised an eyebrow before going to sit by her desk. She slowly stopped typing and gave a huffy response.

"I see you stare at him, it's too obvious girl." I raised both eyebrows this time, running out of the nurse's office as the bell ring. I'd have to face him one time or another. He was just a friend, no sweat.


End file.
